Monday, March 08, 2010

Ta-Dah!

Yo Dawgs! WoW! It's so great to be back in DogBlogville! It feels like forever since I've sat down and rambled on about nuthin'. But have no fear - I'm back and ready to dump my empty thoughts into cyberspace once again.

Before I get too heavily into that, let me start out by makin' a confession. My last post indicated that I would be reportin' for jury duty, and I honestly assumed that I would be makin' the hour and a half trek north each day to do that. The truth is, they have not needed my services yet. I have checked frequently and my status is still "On Call" which means somebody got me all excited for nuthin' I am NOT supposed to report. Now this could all change but my paperwork indicates that they will do their best to give a week's notice before I must report. All that to say, I wanted to get back to my dawgs who are some of the most faithful around.

OK-I'm startin' to see the question marks above your noggins wonderin' just what in tarnation did Big Brown do durin' his week off? Well, truth be told, I decided to take a little blog recess to clear my brain and to catch up on some things that needed my Big Brown attention. I don't wanna bore you with all the details but I will share a couple of the latest happenins:

Top on the list is that the temperatures are risin' and so are the groundhogs. New holes are springin' up everywhere and I'm makin' it my business to investigate and document each and every one. That alone has been more than enough to keep me busy.


Next piece of business is that I finally got a new football. My last one had a run-in with Mom and the new snowblower durin' the blizzard and the end result is not pretty. Not pretty at all. I wouldn'ta believed it had I not seen it with my very own eyes, but I swear it looked like she was tryin' for a field goal as it sailed out of the snowblower and through the clothesline. She denies it all, of course.

WARNING!
THE FOLLOWING PICTURE MAY NOT BE SUITABLE
FOR THOSE WITH A WEAK CONSTITUTION



I have worked with what is left of this shell of a football and sadly must report that it has come along as far as it ever will. It's glory days are over and it will be sent to a nice home where it can live out the rest of it's days in a peaceful surrounding amongst other retirees.

On a more personal note, I had to agree with the PUs that I was in bad need of a make-over. My fur was gettin' shaggy and dull, and my nails were rough and broken from diggin'. Not that I'm obsessed with my looks but it doesn't hurt a dawg to take a little pride in their personal groomin', ya know what I'm sayin'? It's a real chore but sumtimes a dawg's just gotta do what a dawg's gotta do, so I allowed the PUs to take me to the local Pet Wash.


Now don't go thinkin' that this is one of them high-falutin' places that costs a lot of biscuits. I don't come out with little fancy schmancy bows in my fur either. Once here, I take a deep breath, charge through the door, find my place and get to business. 
 
 




Shampoo, rinse and conditioner with minute or two left to blow-dry.
In a matter of minutes the job is done and I can go out.
I usually let a tip for the next dog management on the fencepost outside.

It's still a little chilly so the PUs run the towel over me
before I climb back into the back of Mom's SUV. 



Mom got that washed this weekend too. She put the
new decal her friend bought for her on the window.
Cool, huh?


The PUs have been hearin' good things about some new gadgets to help a dawg maintain his or her good looks and have bought a couple that they are happy to report work rather well. First, the Furminator. If you haven't used one of these, you don't know what you're missin'. I know I've lost several inches on my love handles after they brushed me with it. Dad is amazed and Mom is excited because she's sure it will cut down on the amount of Big Brown hair all over the house. The other Tool du Jour is the Pedipaws nail file. "Yeah, like I'm gonna let them use a battery powered tool on my delicate paws", I thought when I first saw it. Huh! Don't ya know when they wanna use it they give me a bully stick? I wouldn't even know they're smoothin' my nails except for the faint smell of smoke.



Ta-Dah! 

There ya go, that's the highlights of my weekend.
 I'm findin' it hard to believe it's over already.
Now I'm all shined up and nowhere to go but work.
How about you? Not feelin' real shiny about the week ahead?
Ok, let's all take a deep breath, charge through the doors,
find our places and get to business.
The sooner we do, the sooner
we can all say "Ta-Dah" to a job well done.

Chester ;0=)

15 comments:

Dexter said...

You certainly have been a busy chap. When I go to the vet to get my nails done they have to wear masks because of all the smoke! Yikes! Fire in the hole!

Nothing like a good deep cleaning to make one feel fresh and new. I love my furminator, but PeeWee won't hold still and would much prefer to deposit his tumpleweeds around the estate.

Sorry about the football, but it must have been totally cool when it happened.

Slobbers,
Mango

Andrea said...

Chester,
We certainly missed you. Give your mom and furry hug from all of us, too.
Woofs and wags,
sitka

The Musketeers said...

Aww~ Chester ! We miss you dude ! Looking great when you're spueaky clean ! ;)

Life With Dogs said...

Look at you shine! It almost makes one forget about the horror of that slain football. And the fact that it's Monday!

Did you ever think about touching up groundhogs instead of taking them out? You could use the furminator and the pedipaws on them. Maybe you could open a salon...ok, maybe not. But it's a great mental picture. :)

Elysa said...

Ooooh, Chester, you look magnificent! I am going to have to get a furminator for Dixie. And I love your mom's new decal....I have the same one except mine just says "Got Labs?" Have a great week!! ♥

Anonymous said...

You're a real no nonsense kind of dog, huh Chester? I like that. Good luck charting all those groundhogs and their holes. Important work for sure! I have to mention that I haven't heard the phrase "what in tarnation" in a long, long, long time... love your folksy take on life and your "empty thoughts" are no less important than anyone else's. Cyberspace... where empty thoughts multiply and flourish. Hah

Golden Samantha said...

For taking a week off, you sure have been a busy boy! Mourning the almost-dead ball, groundhog huntin' and a major spa treatment! You look just pawsome and I love that decal! Everything's coming up shiny over there!
Hugs xo
Sammie

Martha said...

Hi Chester
Can we just say how very slick you are looking!
We have a furminator and love it but it has not removed our love handles.
We sometimes use it with the spray first which leaves us smelling delightful to humans but of course not dogs.
We usually find something to roll in.
Now the pedipaw thingie we got at xmas and confess to not having used it but are spurred on now by your success.
We hope you enjoy your new ball and where sorry to hear how careless your mom was with the last one!
love and kisses
Martha & Bailey xxx

D.K. Wall said...

You clean up very well, though we would have thought the advantage of being chocolate is the lack of dirt showing and, thus, the lack of baths.

Anonymous said...

Chester, you look doggone beautiful and I'm lovin' your new football...maybe we could play sometime.

Unknown said...

Hmm, I was wondering about the Pediclaws thingy. As for the Furminator, we wouldn't survive without it. There's too many of us and we need it
Twink!

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

Had I known, I would have grabbed Mom's Raybans prior to reading this one!

Mom waved yesterday - did woo see?

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra & Khousin Merdie
PeeEssWoo: I don't think Mom would take me to one of those doggie washermats - she'd be too afraid the authorities would khome fur me!

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

Welcome back, Chester - you look pawsitively wonderful!!! We don't like baths at all, but yours doesn't look so bad. We have to stand for hours and hours while we wait for the silly lady to brush out all our furs, and then again for hours and hours getting that blowdryer blown at us. We get our nails clipped too but no filing with that fancy pedipaws.

We are glad you are back, so let's all take on the week.

Woos - Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

Sagira said...

Welcome back!

You sure do look awful cute after your bath.

Unknown said...

Oh man...
You are so shiny clean I need sunglasses to look at you now. Wowzer.. the ladies love Chester.. you'll have to change your blog title.. LL chester.
norwood

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