Thursday, January 29, 2009

REDNECK DOG OWNERS



Chester's Top Ten Reasons why Your Humans might be Redneck Dog Owners:
(with thanks going out to Jeff Foxworthy for my inspiration)

Your Humans might be Redneck Dog Owners:

If Dad lets you ride up front while Mom sits in the back, they might be redneck dog owners.

If your Mom has more "dog-walking" clothes than dress clothes, they might be redneck dog owners.

If your truck has a sticker telling everybody what breed of dog is hanging it's head out the window, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they plan a whole picnic around a body of water where you like to go swimming, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they only go to restaurants with drive-thru windows so you can ride along, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they have more pictures of you than of the human kids, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they plan a day of shopping but only go to Cabelas, Bass Pro, Lowe's, Gander Mountain, or any other stores that allow dogs, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they turn down invitations from non-dog owning friends just so they can stay home with you, they might be redneck dog owners.

If they flip the couch pillows over to hide the drool marks before company comes, they might be redneck dog owners.

If their bedspread looks like it's made of fur, they might be redneck dog owners.

Ok now, I'm tossing this challenge out to all my K9 friends to see how many more you can fetch for me.

Woofs and slobbers,
Chester

14 comments:

Dughallmor Beagles said...

OMG, so funny....and more than a little bit true i'm, embarrassed to say! Do Dennis and Tucker know you've got their cousin's photo up, lol?
We reckon......if you spend more time writing a Dog Blog than doing housework you might be a Redneck dog owner!!
Slobbers xx

Nibbles Treats said...

Too funny... love your blog!
How about... If you show off pictures of your dog(s) more than pictures of your kids... you might be a Redneck dog owner. BOL!

Tinkerbell, Oscar and Tucker

Chester's Mom said...

Good ones all! Keep 'em comin'
Ches
ps. Hopefully I didn't offend Dennis and Tucker-it's all in fun.

Ms. ~K said...

This is hilarious...
"If your owners buy an RV just so you can travel with them".

"When you pull into a rest stop and dogs pour out of the RV like clowns out of a Volkswagen".

We even drive the RV when we visit in-laws in Alabama (3 hours away) just so the dogs can go...my sil hates having the RV parked in front of her house in her up-scale neighborhood...they call us the Grizwalds...

Yes, I'm a Redneck dog owner and proud of it!!!
Kit

Chester's Mom said...

Clowns out of a volkswagon-HAH! (What's a volkswagon?) Yeah, you definitely have redneck dog parents, gang. No worries-mine are too and it ain't so bad. Chester

Mason Dixie said...

BOL, so funny, I think mom is a Redneck dog owner. "If going to the spa, means going to Petsmart"

Painter Pack said...

Oh I wuv it! I think my mommy and I can safely say YES to all the redneck jones...Koova, my sweetheart actually has a RED neck!! Heheh!!

You might be a redneck dog owner if you keep extra towels in the car just to "cover up" an accident before turning into the drive thru for burgers!

Yes, that is a true story...and I'm sticking to it!

Haroooo!!!

Mya Boo Boo

Hebnix said...

If you keep one of those lint/pet hair rollers located near each door, so that visitors can clean themselves off as they leave. You might be a red-neck dog owner...

If you've ever used them as an excuse to leave early....or worry about what time it is, and how long it's been since they "have been out" while at a family gathering... and then leave early to take care of them...

If you keep a separate (now labeled) jar of peanut butter, for the dogs..... You might be a red-neck dog owner.

If you get home and spend your first 10 mins, repeating the phrase... How's my girl/boy..... Were you a good boy today.... Oh, that's a good girl......

Or if the phrases,"Walk", "Treat" or "Do you have to go pee?" results in Pandemonium! You might be a Red-neck dog owner......

Yep - that's me! With the paw prints on my work pants....

Kris10 said...

Oh so many are of those sound like daily life.

You might be a red neck dog owner if the dog jewelry (water-proof electronic collar) costs more than the owners.

You might be a red neck dog owner if you stand in the dog food isle and read the ingredient labels, but buy whatever human food is on sale...

You might be a red neck dog owner if the dog bed has gotten washed more than your comforter.

You might be a red neck dog owner if you shovel a path in the snow for potty time, but don't worry about shoveling the sidewalks.k

Chester's Mom said...

Hah! I'm loving all your redneck offerings!! Guilty on almost all counts!! Chester

Hebnix: If you keep a pack of Shout wipes in your vehicle to remove paw prints on your way to work, you might be a redneck dog owner! ;0=)

Life With Dogs said...

If your humans use golf clubs to clean up yard poops, they might be redneck dog owners.

Chester's Mom said...

Mr. Author: That pretty much explains why you and your neighbor have such a love/hate relationship!

Hebnix said...

Love the clean-up tips for the yard.... thanks "Life with Dogs"!

One more for the road: If you own a pickup truck with a dog chain permanently mounted, you might be a red-neck dog owner...

I forgot about Zues' favorite spot. Bryan had to remind me....

Mason Dixie said...

Was wondering if we could get your email address, mom says she wants to send Chester something?

not sure. =)

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